Life is hard. There’s no doubt about that. It seems that as technology advances, our work and personal lives get more complicated, and thusly we are left more stressed-out than ever before. Sometimes we just need to blow off some steam.
And do you know the best way to get loose? Bang. Duh.
Sometimes you just need a little sexual healin’, but sometimes you hesitate calling up a fuck buddy. I wonder why that is. Why is texting that FWB so easy when you’re out at a bar five or more drinks in? Well, casual sex isn’t only for weekends.
Instead of pounding a couple of beers on a weeknight to work up the courage to text your fuck buddy, save yourself the hangover and justify that booty call with one of these excuses! Because everyone deserves to get laid, even if it’s on a Wednesday.
Work sucked
Did your boss yell at you today? Well, you should bang to make yourself feel better. Did a project completely fall through? Having sex might make it better. Was your coworker particularly annoying today? Channel your aggression into sexual energy and get it on.
Make a shitty day infinitely better with sex!
Work was great
Did you get a promotion? Celebrate with sex. Did you get the recognition you truly deserve? You should bang. Did you get a raise? Perfect, throw some of that well-earned cash on your bed and fuck on it.
Nothing can make a good day better like getting laid. So call someone over to celebrate, pop some champagne, and express your happiness through some ol’ fashioned fucking.
You’re stressed out and kinda horny
Everyone is stressed out these days. Work is hard which only makes life, which is hard, even harder. If you feel like you have way too much on your plate, you should call someone over and have sex.
Sex is proven to relieve stress as well as improve your health overall.
You’re straight-up bored
There’s nothing on TV. You’ve already binge-watched almost everything interesting on Netflix. You have literally nothing to do. Well, you have nothing to do that’s more entertaining than sex.
You don’t need a real reason to bang. The best booty calls are often the most straightforward ones. So text your FWB for a night of Netflix and chill… where you can either watch the newest thing out on the streaming service or bang with Psych playing softly in the background.
Your heat’s out
If it’s winter this is a great excuse. What’s better than warming up via body heat?
You pulled a muscle at the gym
I know that this might seem a little counterproductive at first. But if you have sore muscles or a kink in your back, sex has been proven to remedy soreness and stand in as a means of pain relief.
It’s all because of endorphins!
You’ve had a bad day/week/month
Have you just been down in the dumps? Has nothing been going your way recently? Well, call up that girl/guy who is incredibly thirsty for you and go at it!
You’ll feel a lot better, because sex makes you feel good all-around and because getting laid will raise your self-esteem. If you just need a win, you definitely can count a good fuck as a win.
You’re extremely water conscious and are just doing your part by finding a shower buddy
If you hadn’t noticed, water conservation has been a big thing (especially on the west coast of the U.S.). So if you’re just looking to reduce the amount of waste you produce while having a little fun of your own, invite an environmentally conscious hottie over to wash up.
Plus, they’ll be able to reach your back!
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